Amateur Bremerton detective finds Jimmy Hoffa
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 32039 Shares
Jerry Price, a retired federal employee and Bremerton fashion icon, was credited with solving a half century old mystery when he discovered the location of long missing labor leader Jimmy Hoffa.
Price related how he unraveled the puzzle: "So there I was drinking a tall boy Rainier, that's the nectar of the gods by the way, when my friends dog Stanley started humping my leg. That always gets me thinking and since I was watching a lifetime movie about Jimmy Hoffa, I thought to myself, why not ask Alexa? I was a little teared up from a combination of watching the lifetime movie and feeling the love from Stanley, but I knew I was on the edge of an incredible discovery. So I said as calmly as I could: where's Jimmy?" Alexa responded with the fateful words: "across the street."
It turns out Jimmy Hoffa has been hiding across the street disguised as a 12 year old girl all this time. Price reported his findings to the Bremerton police who immediately surrounded the suburban location and pulled Hoffa off her skateboard. Hoffa has since been placed in protective custody. The parents of the 12 year old girl were shocked by the revelation. Her obviously shaken mother said: "I have loved that girl since the day I gave birth to her. But Alexa says she's Jimmy, so I know it's true. This one really hurts. It's going to take some time to process."
Bremerton police department public affairs officer Benjamin Dover lauded Price's efforts, saying "we can all learn a lot from him."
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
trudeau approves new canadian flag design Rumor has it Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau, working closely with The Honourable Pablo Rodriguezo, Canadian Heritage minister and Quebec Lieutenant, have finalized the new flag design. Trudeau stated "We are very excited to unveil this updated design which better reflects the direction we are moving the country to" Once approved, unveiling is to take place this year on Canada day.